well scottie never beamed me back up so im stuck here for the moment. today i was thinking about gift giving. how we spend money or perform deeds for those we care about in life. some gifts last for a short period of time ie: flowers, food. other gifts last for a long time ie: jewelry, cars, clothing.
when you give a gift to another most of the time there is an intenton behind it. it could be done for marriage or deeper friendship or possibly to gain the heart of another.
in the BDSM lifestyle my thought is that one of the greatest gift a submissive (sub) can give her Dominant (Dom) is herself. giving of herself fully without question or fears. for as a submissive she allowed oneself to trust in another knowing that Dominant has her best intrest at heart.
as for a Dominant the gift he gives his sub in guidance, acceptance, his inner strength to name a few things.
for a sub not to submit to the will of her Dom she is not really submissive. not to say that she has no voice in the matter. but the final decision always and should be held by the Dom. if you want to disagree with things he has determine to be a course of action. do so with thought and with the understanding that he will listen and then makes his decision.
and for a Dom he needs to have his sub be aware of what she had consider to be a limit and show her that with time and effort that limit can be restablished on another level. provide and give direction to the sub having her realize the beauty she has within knowing she has pleased her Dom.
so as just explain these could be gifts also. but one of the biggest gift a Dom can give his sub is a "collar". a collar being a choker, anklet, bracelet or a broach as an example. she accepts and wear this as her comitment to him. and she has the foresight to know that its not lightly given to any sub. but also has the knowledge to know that it can easily be taken away. so a sub will maintain her submission towards him and follow his guidance. for she does not enter into this agreement and takes his collar only to change direction once the collar has been given.

close encounter of the 3rd kind

have you ever been in a situation where you think you are having an out of body experience. a situation where they say you "act like a different person". i feel like i been going thru that over the last 24 hours.

scottie beam me up.........

what is it with us men that want to either 1. be with two women at the same time or 2. see two women in action with each other. i mean if you ask the average women she will probably tell you this situation has been presented to her in the past.
as for myself i have seen this happen with two women in the past. there was something very mysterious and exciting about what was happening before my eyes. seeing two women making love to one another seem so taboo but also erotic. unlike probably what most men would do she took her time at a very slow but steady pace. searching and probing all areas of the other woman body. no words being spoken just the sounds of gentle moans could be heard. as i watch it became more and more intense for me "what a turn on" and thoughts of "wow that how i should be doing it" for what seem like hours they were having their "fun" with each other. it had started out as me just being an observer. but after what seem like a lifetime of viewing pleasure i just in from behind on one of them and entered her. she motion back with her hips and continue to give pleasure to the other woman. what a thrill when i exploded.
so for me it may be the taboo of it all that intrest me and also its the erotic part that thrills me.

my weekend

its seems to have been a long weekend for me. so many things to do and so little time to complete them in. i felt like there needed to be three of me to complete all the tasks i wanted to complete. well i didnt get the chance to spend time with my "sub" as i would have wanted to do. i also realized by not seeing her more frustration inside me was building up that i would normally release on her. now dont get me wrong its not a whipping post i use her for. its a way of me finding my "zen".
speaking of releasing frustration from the viewpoint of a Dominant towards a submissive is usually some form of punishment. now for me that a tricky situation. you see i do enjoy various forms of "punishment" on her. but what makes it so tricky is that the sub enjoys it more. i find that to be arousing but also interesting. with my last sub when i punished her by means of spanking by the second time she was punish that way she truely knew without a doubt how submissive she should be to my commands. now with my current sub she looks forward to a good spanking. with her so far i have used my hand, belt, paddle, rubber, and a wooden stick. with most of these items she was in pain. i could tell by her reaction that she was getting the point. but she at the same time started to enjoy it. she thinks i have run out of "tricks" to use as a form of punishment on her but sadly she is wrong. i have a few more things up my sleeve. you see the key is to not show any facial marks and not any type of pain/discomfort that would require a hospital visit. but there are ways still to get the job done. a good Dom would show some respect for her vanilla life. so i dont want her to be black and blue from marks for weeks at a time. i promise you the next time we are together she will experience a new form of pain.

hmmm

why is it with this sub i seem to be acting so different from in the past. there are things about her that i will not do as i have with other subs in the past. she is able to distract me when we are together and my thoughts and plans seem to be forgotton.

she is also at the same time a little "bratty" mostly this happens when we are not face to face with one another. this upsets me most of the time. its not like i dont give her attention. in my mind i do give her a lot of attention more than what most other Doms would do. but still there is a part of her that i belives enjoys acting that way. i have not yet taken any extreme measures to punish her for these acts. but i do know i need to get her more under control really soon. there are a few things that i have in mind to really have her learn what punishment can mean in a bad way. i have not implemented any of them yet due to a few things she has told me about her past. but now i do realize that they do need to be used for her to fully realize how "what i say i mean for her to do".

now dont get me wrong when we are together she gives 110% of herself to ensure that she is fully submissive and would do what ever it may take to please me. and there are times when i will do things to her to push her limits higher and higher. i could remeber at first that if her pussy was played with to much she said it would coause her discomfort. now its to the point where i can play with it for hours without any discomfort. im pleased to see her progress to that level. i remeber the first time i spanked her. i could tell she was in a little pain at first. but now i had to increase the lever of pain using various items and she looks forward to the next spanking encounter. ( i have created a monster......lol)

more to follow

the start

what i feel on the inside is not easy to explain to those who have no ideal of the lifestyle. its hard to have others understand the feeling its gives you on the inside when they are so closed minded. you find those when you try to explain standing there with a puzzled look on their face. they look at you as if i had fallen on my head and bruised it hard.

see it all started over a month ago. thinking back to that point my mind begins to wander.
you see it was a normal day for me. i was online reading profiles on a BDSM site. all of a sudden i came across this new profile. my usual response is just to read the profile and move on to the next. but this one for some reason caught my intrest. her background information was breif but to the point. the picture of her expression seem to look inside me. i thought to myself "hey i should send her a note". then i cam across a shocking entry. it was the part that showed her age. wow she is only 22 and here it is im 48. what am i doing here trying to meet and introduce this lifestyle to a woman so much younger than me.
so after a few moments i decided to proceed with the note. after a short time period she responded. and for the next hour we sent notes back and forth to each other. well i decided to go ahead and speak with her more in depth. first thru emails then by phone. the more we spoke i was able to find out about her intrest in this lifestyle of BDSM and some about her past. she was new to what this "world" is all about but was willing to gain knowledge. i explain some protocol areas for her to start off as well as what my expectations would be for her. also gave her some information on my background and what she could expect from me in the near future.
after some time had passed i agreed to drive over and meet her at a public location. shorty after my arrival at the location i spotted her and from there we went to a location to sit and talk. we talked and got to know each other better face to face while i was there. i found her upon my meeting to be a wonderful woman both inside and out. she had sort of this school girl look but with a mature thought process.
when i first touched her i could tell she was a little nervous. that was very understandable. she allowed herself to relax and willing to what was happening to her in all aspects. her body felt soft yet firm in all the right places. her reaction to my touches were exciteful and pleasant. we touched and kiss and talked during my stay.
im so glad i met her